Sunday, January 30, 2011

And Now for the Hard Part...Waiting.


Friday night and Saturday morning, I was nerve and anxiety free.  I think we both just felt covered in prayer.  It was so surreal to be taking the step that we had worked so hard to get to over the last month and a half.  This is the moment we were waiting for.  All of those shots and procedures were for this one day.

Before heading into the procedure we met with our doctor to discuss our embryo report.  Out of the 9 that were left, only ONE of them was ready to implant.  I knew that God was in control of which one they would choose to put in yesterday, but wow!  There was no mistaking which one He had chosen.  I think that calmed my heart even more, knowing that there was only one option and that He had made it very clear for the doctors.  It made me feel as though the Lord was right there with us, saying, “I got this!  I am in control.”  How amazing.  It gave me goose bumps.

Before going in for a transfer they make you drink  16 ounces of water and you can’t go to the bathroom until they are done with your procedure. Your bladder forces your uterus to lie down and gives the doctors a window to see into your uterus. My procedure should have started at about 10 am.  However, my bladder wasn’t cooperating and I had to drink another 16 ounces.  They rechecked and decided that I needed to drink an additional 16 ounces of water.  I was water logged to say the least.  And 48 ounces later, I was ready to roll. And ready to go to the bathroom, haha.  

In an earlier blog, when we received the news of my unicornuate uterus, I stated that I would never forget seeing that image on the HSG screen.  It is burned in my mind forever.  The same is true for what I saw yesterday.  I could see our little embryo on the ultrasound screen.  It was incredible.  Even if it doesn’t make it, I will never forget seeing him or her appear on the screen. It was a little white dot, about the size of a miniature pea.  I got a split second glimpse of the life God created.  Only He knows if we will ever get to meet him or her.  I am in awe of that momentary glimpse.

After the procedure, I had to lie down for 30 minutes.  They told me I only had to make it 15 minutes, but I was more than determined to make it 30 minutes.  After all it took to get to this point, I was not giving in to the bladder.  After it was all said and done, I walked out to the lobby, grabbed Brad and we headed home.  Just like that.

What an odd feeling.  All I can describe it as is an out of body experience.

We are just taking it easy this weekend. I am feeling great so far.  Now it is wait and see. 
This is going to be the hardest part, hands down.  Every little cramp or twinge sends my mind on a rat race. 

Thank you so much for all the prayers.  We truly felt covered in prayer and are so thankful for how unselfishly everyone thought of us.  Thank you for loving us well.  We appreciate your prayers in the coming week as we cling to the hope that God is growing this little life in me, while at the same time attempting to guard our hearts from disappointment.

PRAY, PRAY, PRAY!  





3 comments:

Tiffany said...

Praying for you!!

Christi Rutt said...

Im praying for you, I miss you, I love you and I look up to you more than you will know. <3

3-5 ELA Teacher said...

I am praying for you today. Waiting to hear how God answers. May God guard your heart and mind in His perfect peace.